disappointed

Well, I made it 3 days without a cigarette! Yay me, right?! Hold on before you start singing my praises.......I relapsed! Last night it got so bad I just could not take it any more. I went and bought a pack of cigarettes. I didn't buy my normal brand, and they taste really, really bad. I just finally came to the conclusion that things around here aren't stable enough for me to make this big step. I just don't have the support that i did two years ago. The really bad thing is I feel like I have let eveyone down. Everyone thinks I am so strong, and I can get through anything, but they are wrong! I may be strong when it comes to certain things in my life, but otherwise I am very weak. I am really beating myself up over this. Not only did I let my son down, but I let myself down! Is there a rehab for smokers??? When I quit using I hid away from everyone and everything, until I was strong enough to stand on my own. I even went to my family's house when my mother was at work, so i wouldn't be alone, and fall to temtation. This is just way different! I used for a year and a half, I've smoked for 14 years! There are other pros and cons, but I don't feel like getting into them right now. I just feel like a big failure! I suppose the good news is that I have a pack of cigarettes right in front of me and haven't smoked at all this morning! I'm sorry to all of you out there that I have let down because of this and other things as well. Pray for me, please! Pray to God to provide me with strength and courage and wisdom to get through this uphill battle. I can't do it alone, and thats how I feel right now.....alone.