the big fat quitter

Well, this has been day one! My doctor prescribed me Chantix, for 3 months. I have to go in monthly to get checked to make sre everything is still ticking right. My acutal quit day is on the 21st of November. You have to give the medication a week, to not only take affect, but to let your system adjust. So I have had 10 cigaretts since this morning which is great considering I was smoking a pack and a half a day! There is one bad side effect! 30% of patients that have been on Chantix have experienced suicidal thoughts and needs. Since I have already been in the hospital twice for suicidal thoughts, my doctor is concerned with my case. She made it very clear that if I start having thoughts of suicide, i am to call her, immediately! She gave me the number to her phone in her office, as well as her cell, and pager number. I really like my doctor! But I'm pretty sure I will be fine. Things are different now, way different! I'm in a better place in my life than I was before. I also have the support of my family and wonderful friends. Plus, I wouldn't want to put everyone I care about through, what Mikey did to me and his family. I'll get more detailed about that in a later blog! Needless to say, I am much happier, and stronger than I was 2 years ago! My goal for tomorrow is to cut down to only 5 cigarettes, we will see how that goes! The hardest times for me seem to be right after i eat! If I quit eating maybe I won't want a cigarette!!!!! ha! I'm on my way to bed! I'd say that today was a pretty good day!